No healthy relationship was created on the
foundation of mistrust and dishonesty. Once you start lying to your
partner, family and friends, you slowly begin to chip off that trust
bestowed on you little by little and eventually crash every thing you've
built over the years.
Honesty is a very important
factor in any thriving relationship, couples who have stronger
relationships are usually more open to each other and communicate more
effectively.
Shakti Sutriasa of Huffington post gives three reasons, lying destroys your relationship
- Trust: How do you have a relationship without trust? I need to trust that my lawyer or accountant is ethical, does things legally and has my best interests in mind. Likewise, I need to trust that my employees are truthful with me, don't steal or reveal trade secrets. As we need trust in our business relationships, we need it even more in our intimate ones. I want to know that what you promise to do, what you say, you genuinely mean. Then I can count on you, physically and emotionally. I used to have a relationship in which I could not rely on my partner. He was never there for me. He would always say yes or be indecisive but then when the day rolled around, would be unavailable. Guess what happened?
- When You're Trustworthy, I Open Up More: We all crave intimacy. We all want to be known and understood. This only happens when we feel emotionally safe with another person. I allow myself to be vulnerable because I know my husband will support me. If I share a deep fear or angst with him, he doesn't belittle me or make me wrong. Instead he listens deeply, and encourages me. This kind of sharing can only happen when we're truthful. If instead of listening to me, my husband cracked a joke or placated me with a lie, I would cease opening up to him. And eventually we would grow farther and farther apart.
- A Genuine Sounding Board Not A Yes Man: Think about it. Do you have respect for people who always tell you what you want to hear? It may feel nice at first but isn't it so much more refreshing when someone is honest? When they question your judgment or actions? We all need people in our lives who can be the voice of encouragement or concern -- who take on either role. It gives us clarity and truthful feedback. This only comes with honesty, trust and rapport.